So, after yesterday’s experiment, I think it’s safe to say that the vast majority of you didn’t really understand any of it. Today, as an experiment, I’ve decided to write some kind of explanation for each of yesterday’s in-jokes, just to prove how disappointing the stories are:
1. A reference to the pub that Nick, Rodney and I went to last Friday to celebrate Graybo’s birthday in his absence. The journey from where we were sitting to the gentlemen’s toilets took you down thirty-seven steps and through five doors.
2. Dru walks out of his larder brandishing a tin of Sainsbury’s Seville Orange Marmalade, and proclaimed that “it does exactly what it says on the tin”.
3. An old Trevor and Simon joke. Used as a reference to anything that’s not particularly good—particularly software failures.
4. As Pull made their way down to Guildford in a big white van to support Mansun, I asked their front-man to “say something profound” into the tape recorder. This was his response.
5. Right at the end of the Virtuoso Guitarist’s infamous solo demo tape, there’s a short recording from the end of one of our rehearsals, where we are packing up the equipment. This was the line that those concerned remember the most.
6. After dinner at the big blogger household, we played a board game where one person describes a word on a card, and the another has to guess what that word is. This was my default answer, used at every opportunity.
7. At a previous employer, I noticed that all the techies in my row sat in height order. Also, the taller the techie, the longer the first name—I was therefore right at the end on both counts. Management then decided to rearrange the seating order.
8. While in Pembrokeshire, I was trying to point out a rare Fulmar gull to an ex-girlfriend.
9. At an even more previous employer, the general manager actively enforces a new rule that meant that food and drink must not be on show.
10. The punchline of one of my father’s stories from his childhood—in some way related to the teacher’s pet.